Last Day in Pelgaroin (2)

I offered the count an awkward smile without answering.

I understood what he was trying to say. But acting as though I'd seen through his intentions would have been rude, so I held my tongue.

The count studied me for a moment. Then, with his usual stony expression, he spoke in a grave voice.

“In other words, I'm praising you. I wasn't trying to insult you. Do you understand?”

He had gone out of his way to explain himself in case I'd taken offense. His manner was cold and precise, but the warmth behind his words was unmistakable.

I was hardly the sort of person who would refuse kindness when it was offered.

“Of course, Your Excellency.”

“Hmph. Good. It has been some time since I last saw your face. I can't say it's unpleasant.”

“Seeing Your Excellency again is a pleasure for me as well.”

“You certainly know how to talk. Do you think that sort of flattery will please me?”

The corners of his mouth twitched.

But it does please you, doesn't it?

For someone who seemed so difficult to approach, the count could be surprisingly easy to read.

Perhaps he noticed my smile. He gave a loud cough and straightened his back.

“Enough idle chatter. Hildes reported to me shortly after I returned to the castle. Is it true you caught all the bandits?”

Strictly speaking, the elf had caught them. I hadn't done much of anything.

I couldn't very well explain that.

“Yes, Your Excellency.”

“You seem to have carried out your duties as regent admirably. I'm glad my judgment of you wasn't misplaced.”

He paused.

“But what exactly happened at the ball?”

“The ball…?”

“The evening my daughter slapped you across the cheek.”

“Ah.”

I'd almost managed to forget that incident.

That, too, had been because of the elf. But the knowledge didn't make the memory any easier to bear.

How am I supposed to explain it?

While I hesitated, voices rose outside the door.

“My lady! You can't go in! Viscount Theorad and His Excellency the Count are speaking!”

“Do you think I'm an idiot? I know that. I only want to look in from a distance. Is even that forbidden?”

“Honestly, my lady…”

After a little more arguing, a familiar face appeared around the edge of the half-open door.

Ashley.

She peered into the room with the furtive curiosity of a cat eyeing a stolen fish. When our gazes met, her cheeks reddened in surprise.

She hesitated.

Then a smile bloomed across her face, and she gave me a small wave.

I almost raised my hand to wave back.

Only at the last moment did I remember that her father was sitting in front of me.

“I hear you attempted to steal my daughter's lips,” the count continued. “Even if you're engaged, such behavior is hardly becoming of a gentleman.”

“Y-yes.”

I answered, but my eyes kept drifting toward the doorway.

Ashley must have realized I was looking at her. She stepped out into clearer view, lifted both fists beside her head, and pointed her index fingers upward.

Her lips formed a stern pout, and she tried to imitate her father's imposing expression.

The angry count.

That was what she was pretending to be.

She was trying to ease my nerves by making fun of him.

Unfortunately, it was working a little too well.

Don't laugh. Whatever you do, don't laugh.

I struggled to keep my face straight while the count's brows drew together.

“Of course, I can understand your impatience. You've known each other for years, and the relationship has scarcely progressed. You're still young. But kissing a woman without her permission isn't the conduct of a gentleman. Have I made myself clear?”

“Yes, Your Excellency. I'll remember that.”

“Very well. I'll let the matter pass this once.”

The count settled back into his usual businesslike manner.

“Now, let's return to the matter of your reward for capturing those robbers.”

“Reward? But I only did my duty.”

“A man should be rewarded for doing his duty well. There are plenty in this world who cannot even manage what ought to be expected of them. Good work should be recognized, just as wrongdoing should be punished. There's no need to be bashful.”

He clapped his hands twice.

“Come in.”

The exchange outside the door resumed at once.

“My lady, that is my duty—”

“It's fine. Let me do it.”

“Would you give it back if I told you no?”

“I'm not throwing a tantrum. I'm expressing a perfectly reasonable opinion.”

“…Very well.”

The servant surrendered with an audible sigh.

A moment later, Ashley came into the room carrying a small box. She greeted me and placed it on the table.

The count turned in surprise.

“Ashley?”

For an instant, even his severe eyes looked genuinely bewildered.

“Why aren't you in your room?”

“I wanted to see Father as soon as possible. And I wanted to apologize to Lord Theorad. I was terribly rude to him the other day.”

There was nothing particularly impertinent in that answer, but the count's stern expression softened anyway.

“Quite right. Slapping your fiancé in front of an entire ballroom is hardly polite. I'm glad you've recognized your mistake.”

“Of course. I may be young, but I do have some sense. I'm Father's daughter, after all.”

The words were as sweet as honey.

So this is what they mean when they say a father is helpless before his daughter.

The count's face relaxed into a small smile. Then he turned toward me and pushed the box across the table.

I straightened my back.

“Open it. I prepared a modest gift to thank you for looking after the county in my absence.”

“Yes, Your Excellency.”

The box was ornate without being gaudy, its lid embossed with the emblem of House Pelgaroin.

I lifted the lid.

Inside were gold coins and jewels of every kind.

I drew in a startled breath.

“Your Excellency… This is far too generous a reward for capturing a handful of bandits.”

His expression hardened.

“Are you rejecting my goodwill?”

“No, but—”

“Take it. I won't hear another word.”

I considered protesting again.

It seemed likely that the count had wanted to give me this treasure from the start and had merely found a convenient reason to do so.

But refusing would only insult his generosity.

I accepted the box.

The count smiled, then waved us away.

“I'm tired. I have matters concerning the imperial family to review. Both of you may leave.”

For some reason, I heard another meaning beneath the words.

Go on. Spend some time together.

Ashley looked toward me with a little smile. Apparently she'd understood it the same way.

“Shall we go, Lord Theorad?”

“Of course.”

---

We left the drawing room and crossed the castle courtyard together.

Flower buds slept beneath the night sky, waiting for tomorrow to open. I touched the brooch at my throat and stared upward, unsure how to begin a conversation.

Ashley was quiet too.

By the time we reached the middle of the courtyard, she finally spoke.

“I'm sorry.”

The apology caught me off guard.

I cleared my throat.

“What for?”

“For making you look like the villain. I slapped you in front of everyone, and then I didn't visit you for four whole days. I'm sure people are saying, ‘Lady Ashley must be furious with Lord Theorad. She won't even meet him.’”

“That's nonsense. You did it all for my sake.”

“Even so…”

“Please don't worry. We're walking together like this before I leave the castle, aren't we? The servants are bound to see us. They'll spread their own rumors.”

In fact, it had been Ashley's idea to walk through the courtyard rather than remain indoors.

She wanted the servants who happened to witness us to carry word that my reputation had been restored.

“That's true. People will say we've made up.” She pouted. “But it still makes me angry.”

“Why?”

“We never even fought, yet now everyone thinks we've reconciled after a quarrel. The more I think about it, the more I hate that elf for tormenting you.”

“So do I. I didn't want anything to come between us, but avoiding trouble in our relationship seems to be getting harder.”

“What sort of trouble?”

I scratched my cheek, embarrassed.

“Well… I'm worried about what might happen between us when it comes to… intimate matters.”

“Intimate matters?”

She tilted her head.

“What part worries you?”

Could I really tell her?

I hesitated, but Ashley was watching me expectantly. I couldn't bring myself to retreat now.

I spoke as though confessing a sin.

“My first time… I'm afraid the elf might take it from me before you can.”

“Your… first time?”

Ashley stopped.

I stopped with her.

For several moments she said nothing at all. Finally, after collecting herself, she spoke in a strained voice.

“Lord Theorad… You've never been with a woman?”

Of course not.

Ever since we became engaged, Ashley had been the only woman I thought about in that way.

“No. Haven't you been the same?”

“Well, I'm a woman, so of course, but… You're the eldest son of a noble house. I thought most aristocratic families arranged that sort of education for their sons…”

“I understand what you mean. But House Deharem has no such coming-of-age custom. I swear before the God of Light that I've never slept with a woman.”

Ashley's face flushed scarlet.

Her hands fluttered helplessly in front of her. After a while, she looked almost on the verge of tears.

“If… if you'd told me sooner, I might somehow have… Before that elf could… The two of us could have…”

She kept beginning sentences without finishing them.

I stared at her.

“What are you trying to say?”

“I don't mean…”

It was frustrating to see her struggling so much.

“If there's something you want to do, you can do it right here and now. I have to leave tomorrow. There isn't much time.”

“H-here? That's ridiculous! How could we do something like that here?”

“Then never mind.”

I took a step back, teasing her.

Ashley promptly took two steps toward me.

What?

The distance between us vanished.

She gently caught me around the waist. Her cheeks were bright red, and she looked almost dazed.

“Then… forgive me for being a little bold.”

“Bold about wh—”

She rose onto her toes and pressed her lips to mine.

…!

My eyes widened. My heart beat so loudly that I could scarcely hear anything else.

For an instant, my thoughts simply stopped.

It was as though the whole world had fallen still and every worry I'd carried had slipped away.

The kiss lasted perhaps five seconds.

It felt like five minutes.

When she finally drew back, Ashley smiled shyly.

“That was my first kiss. Was it yours too, Lord Theorad?”

“…Yes. My first.”

“I'm glad. I didn't want to lose even that to the elf.”

Her breathing was a little uneven.

Then, as though suddenly remembering something important, she caught my hand.

“Lord Theorad… I know this may be presumptuous, but will you promise me one thing?”

“I promise.”

Ashley lifted her face.

Her eyes, blue as lapis lazuli, reflected the stars and my own image.

“Even if the elf takes the first time of your body…”

She drew my hand toward her and rested it against her upper chest, keeping a firm hold on my wrist.

Her lips parted with an expression that was almost sad.

“Please… let the first place in your heart belong to me.”

She had an extraordinary way of making even her own selfish wish feel like consideration for someone else.

Yet I understood the impossible predicament we faced. For now, Ashley and I would have to keep up the little performance that let us protect what was ours.

“Will you?”

Her smile was as delicate as a forget-me-not.

My chest ached.

I placed a hand behind her head and drew her into my arms.

“Ashley,” I whispered, “for me, the first has always been you.”

And it always would be.

I held her close and gently patted her back.