The Young Lady Who Wants to Love (2)

Must you be quite so nervous, my lady?

The head maid could understand Ashley's surprise at an unexpected visit. But there was a limit to how many times she could reassure someone before it became a commotion in its own right.

Young love was sweet. It could also be exhausting.

Remembering how she'd felt when she first met her own husband, the maid smiled gently.

“My lady, how many times must I tell you that you look fine?”

“B-but…!”

“Enough now. Even if you're the young lady of the house, if you keep questioning my word, I shall be cross. You wouldn't want that, would you?”

Ashley swallowed and nodded. The head maid had cared for her all her life. She had no desire to upset the woman over something so trivial.

That did nothing to slow her heartbeat.

Her lapis-blue eyes quivered, and she could hardly keep her gaze from the ground. Heat spread all the way to her ears.

Ashley always wanted Theorad to see her at her best. To greet him in such an unguarded state felt almost unforgivable.

If there had been a mouse hole nearby, she might gladly have hidden inside it. Instead, she drew a deep breath and forced herself to regain her composure.

Don't stand here trembling like a fool!

As Count Leonberg's daughter, she had a dignity to uphold. More importantly, the elf was standing beside Theorad.

Ashley and Theorad were supposed to be on terrible terms. With the elf watching, Ashley would have to play a completely different role from the one her heart desired.

I must become a villain who despises Theorad.

She repeated that thought until she could move her feet, then walked toward him.

The closer she came, the harder it was to keep a delighted smile from escaping. Somehow she managed.

They stopped near the antique fountain in the center of the garden.

“….”

For a moment neither spoke. The elf's attentive presence stood between them like a wall.

Theorad gave a small cough, searching for a way to begin. Before he could speak, Marhan interrupted with an impatient smile.

“Viscount Theorad! Why are you hesitating? The moment he reached the castle, he asked me where he could find you, my lady.”

“M-Marhan!”

“He's shy in your presence. Quite delicate for a viscount, isn't he? Ha!”

Marhan laughed and clapped her hands, as if an even better story had just occurred to her.

“Oh, I remember! Last year, there was that conversation about a favorite dish. And he even said he wanted to try making it himself!”

Marhan gave an enthusiastic thumbs-up and looked to Ashley for approval.

“Isn't he a wonderful man, my lady?”

Please be quiet, Marhan!

Theorad's silent scream went unnoticed. Marhan only meant to help an awkward couple grow closer. She had no idea that she was doing the opposite.

“My… Master really is so considerate…” the elf murmured.

Something dangerous glimmered in both of her red eyes.

She had never liked Theorad's connection to Ashley. Every affectionate memory Marhan supplied gave her another reason to resent it.

A chill ran down Theorad's spine. For a moment he felt an entirely unreasonable surge of irritation toward Marhan. She had managed to press the trigger on a bomb that had, until then, been quiet.

But she couldn't know that. He had no right to blame her for trying to be kind.

“Marhan.”

“Yes, Viscount?”

“I appreciate your concern, but please allow us to discuss our affairs ourselves.”

“But I only wanted the two of you to grow a little closer…”

Ashley fixed Marhan with a cold stare.

“Sir Marhan. Your duty here is finished. You may return to the courtyard.”

“My lady? Why are you suddenly so—”

“I said, return.”

Her voice was quiet, but there was an edge to it that brooked no argument.

Marhan straightened at once.

“My apologies! I'll return immediately!”

Ashley gave no further order. Two warnings from the Count's daughter were quite enough to send any knight away. Yet Marhan still couldn't understand why a young woman known for her mild manner had turned so stern. She left with her head bowed and a puzzled look on her face.

At least the well-meaning intruder was gone.

Ashley drew a steadying breath and faced Theorad.

“Sir Theorad.”

Their eyes met.

Without another word, both understood: the garden would have to become a stage.

“You came without sending word. Have you forgotten all courtesy and respect?”

“How absurd. Must a man request permission every time he visits his fiancée's home?”

“Your manners are as poor as ever.”

They exchanged looks of perfect disdain.

The head maid, who had been watching beside Ashley, stared in astonishment. The couple had seemed pleased to see each other a moment ago. Why were they arguing?

The elf watched with narrowed eyes. Ashley judged that the longer their quarrel continued, the more convincing it would become.

She turned her displeasure toward the elf.

“And another thing. Have you lost your mind, bringing a slave into this garden?”

“…Why?” Theorad asked.

“Why? My father and I have devoted ourselves to this garden. Surely you don't believe a lowly slave should be allowed to wander through it?”

It was a lie—not about her affection for the garden, but about its purpose. Ashley had always allowed the household servants and slaves to enjoy it. It had been designed as a place of rest for them, not a private amusement for the nobility.

Theorad knew that as well as she did.

Her apparent snobbery was a signal: she wanted the elf removed so they could speak alone.

He lifted his chin, affecting indifference.

“Hmph. I see no reason to refuse you. Take her if you like.”

“I intend to. Maid, take this slave to the dining hall. There must be chores she can do.”

“Yes, my lady.”

The head maid bowed and took the elf by the arm.

The elf resisted at once. Reaching desperately toward Theorad, she cried out.

“M-Master…! You told me to stay by your side today… for an hour…!”

Cold sweat broke across Theorad's forehead.

That sounded like a threat. In her voice he could almost hear the unspoken warning: If you let them take me away, you'll regret it.

Once again, his life seemed to depend on a choice between two impossible answers.

He could remain with the elf and buy his immediate safety, or allow himself a little happiness with Ashley and risk the elf's anger.

I have to choose the elf…

He was almost ready to yield when Ashley gave a small, sad smile.

Ah.

It was a look of quiet understanding, as though she had already accepted that he would choose his own safety over her.

Theorad felt a sharp ache in his chest.

He couldn't bear to hurt Ashley again. Even if the elf threatened his life, he would not willingly add another scar to hers.

He turned toward the elf with the coldest expression he could muster.

“You're speaking nonsense again, you insect.”

Her pupils trembled.

“W-what…?”

Turbulent emotions flickered in her eyes. Theorad found it terrifying, but he'd made his choice.

“I have no wish to see you. Take my slave away.”

“Y-yes, my lord.”

The head maid bowed and led the elf away by the arm. This time the elf stopped resisting. She glanced back repeatedly, her mouth set in a bitter line. When Theorad did not look toward her, she bit her lip and clutched at her skirt.

Then she disappeared beyond the garden path.

Only after she'd gone did Ashley release the furious expression she'd been wearing.

“Haa…”

Her strength seemed to drain away. Theorad let out a deep breath of his own and loosened the brooch at his throat.

Their eyes met again.

This time, they both laughed helplessly.

“That was terribly reckless,” Ashley said.

“If I weren't reckless, how would I ever find time alone with you?”

Theorad managed a playful tone, though his voice trembled faintly. Perhaps even now he was trying to make her worry less by pretending the danger had been nothing.

How could she not love a man like that?

He was almost foolishly kind, willing to endanger himself for a moment with her. That kindness made Ashley's own helplessness harder to endure.

She wanted to do more for him. She hated that she could not.

“…I'm sorry.”

Theorad gave a rueful little laugh.

“Don't say what I was about to say.”

“But…”

“No. I came here so we could share a little happiness, not dwell on our sorrows. Didn't I?”

He was right. Their time together was too precious to spend on regret.

Ashley nodded, then remembered something and frowned at him.

“…You were unkind.”

“What?”

“Coming without notice. You gave me such a fright.”

“Then I apologize for my discourtesy. If there's anything I can do to make it up to you, you need only ask.”

Ashley considered his offer.

“Then grant me a wish.”

“A wish?”

“Three, actually.”

He didn't know what she intended to ask, but he saw no reason to refuse.

“Very well. I'll do whatever I can.”

“Truly?”

“I don't lie.”

“Then… this is my first wish.”

Ashley raised both arms and held them out to him. She stared at him expectantly, a light blush creeping across her cheeks.

“…Must I say it aloud?”

Oh.

At last Theorad understood. He stepped forward and gathered her into his arms.

For a moment their hands hovered awkwardly. Then each found the other's back, and they held each other close.

It was warm and reassuring. In his arms, Ashley felt her worries retreat, as though the world had become quiet for a moment.

Sir Theorad…

She did not want to lose him. She wanted desperately to free him from the elf's grasp.

The knowledge that he had already had a sexual relationship with the elf still brought her pain whenever it crossed her mind.

Please don't give up.

Under the fading evening sky, Ashley held him a little tighter.